Channel Surfing

It’s Saturday Night and Darren and Connor are off to bond at the racetrack.  Most every Saturday night they spend quality father/son time...but sometimes C. gets so latched to me he doesn’t want to go.  So this morning I bought him some way cool noise cancellation head phones, and he couldn’t WAIT to try them out at the racetrack!  (Oh Yeah I’m that Good).   

D. repeatedly asked ‘are you sure you don’t want to go? Yes, yes…I don’t want to take from quality MAN time.  As much as I LOVE being alone…the second they left I was bored.  I have a good book I’m in the middle of, I could finish my Sunday School lesson, I could mop the floor,  I could go for a walk,  I could write the next great American novel……but instead I just laid on the couch, completely UNMOTIVATED.  I really wanted to eat the ice cream in the freezer (you know the ice cream my very lean husband bought and eats about ½ cup a week.  Who does that!?)  But I told myself ‘No’, I worked out hard this morning…I am not eating ice cream.  Still, I could not MOVE off the couch. 

This is pretty much my channel flipping history; I guess major networks assume that people go OUT like Johnny Travolta on a Saturday night:

SYFY ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’:  I’m sorry I don’t buy 'Even Stevens'’ (Shia LeBeouf) as the new Indiana Jones…moving right along.

CNBC ‘Princess’:  (where rich brats are reformed through a financial adviser):  Direct quote from Father- “She just breaks that credit card out and doesn’t care what she spends..she was born spoiled”.  Let me think about this one…YOU are the Father…TAKE THE CREDIT CARD AWAY and teach some financial responsibility.  I can’t watch this, it annoys me.

I could use some ice-cream…no, no, no. Don’t think about it..skip over the Food Network.

A&E ‘Hoarders’:  I’m going to GAG looking at the toilet in that house….I’m serious how do you eat at that table??..I’m going to GAG again…I know you want to change your life on this show, but I can’t watch this anymore.

BET ‘Music Awards’:  So Cool Steve Harvey won an award, and he THANKED God and his mama who took him to church! I don’t know any of these singers, where is Beyonce?  Moving on….

TBS ‘The Wedding Planner’:  I’ve seen this before….Yeah Right..noooo way is J-LO single and lonely. 

Why the heck isn’t anyone on Facebook?  Geez am I the ONLY one bored.

Still thinking about ice-cream in the freezer.

NBC ‘Dateline Real Life Mysteries’:  YIKES, the music is scaring me.  Have I seen that guy before?  This show is making me think there is a masked man outside my window NOW..turning channel, turning channel…..

Shop Network ‘Sexy Swimsuits’:  …haaaaaaaaa.  Underwear is less revealing.  What else is on?

Discovery Health ‘Untold Stories of the ER’:  …GROOOOSSSSSSSS ME OUT.

Well I don’t want ice-cream now. 

Lifetime for Women ‘Fatal Lessons- The Good Teacher’:  Drama about a teacher? Noooo thanks.

I’m sure there are people on Facebook now? Great, no one.

E! ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians’:  SO SICK OF THE KARDASHIANS…good grief E! just change your name to the Kardashian channel.  Where is the E! True Hollywood Story on Guns N' Roses??

Showtime- ‘New Moon/ Twilight’:  Oh for goodness sake…quit pining over a dead guy and go to college!  Way to go Bella you just set woman kind back 10 years by crying over a boy the whole movie.

I’ll just buy a movie on my DVR, but first I’m getting some ice cream. 

Beastly….Is this for age 13 and under?  This dialogue bites…and I think the whole point is that it’s the inside that counts, not the outside?  Unless you’re an actor…then nobody cares about your insides, but you do have to know how to ACT in a movie ( I think).

Well I wasted my whole night doing NOTHING.  I did manage to pluck my eyebrows, but I don’t think you should pluck when channel surfing….I  look like this now! (Maybe I’ll start a new trend).  

Now the crew is home, so I splashed some soap suds on my face to make it look like I was scrubbing the bathtub, being so busy as normal.  :)