Monday, July 21, 2014

A Breath Of Fresh Awe

If most people had to fully describe me, they definitely would have to use words like- 
wound tight, keyed up, walking heart attack 
(not to completely describe me, but it would have to be a part...)

I wish I could blame it on my job, my kids, or someone else,
 but when I was a 19 year old cashier, I use to stress if my rings per minute were down.

I've been wound up tight my whole life.
I am motivated.  I am a goal setter.  
I am annoying as crap.
I'm terrible at managing my stress.

Over the years I've even tried a variety of medications for my worrisome nature, but they usually just make me slow, sleepy, lethargic... 
I would rather be spastic.
I even read an article that may explain why my children were such excessive criers as babies.

When my friend J. sent out an invite to the 
Yoga and Creative Writing Workshop- Igniting your Creative Flame,
I thought it looked interesting but not necessarily for me.....

...I didn't want a bunch of hipsters wearing hemp pants telling me to kiss Budha, put my legs behind my head, and Hummmmm Breath my way through two children, a husband, and stack of bills.
Yeah. Right.
Besides, who was going to unload the dishwasher while I'm gone??

Then J. and I went to lunch and she told me her experience of writing, moving, and understanding herself in moments of stress and anxiety.  
We often talk about nurturing our spiritual lives, which can mean different things to us at times, but I enjoy our conversations.

J. knew I enjoyed the creative writing process, and she highly encouraged me to do this workshop.

These days I'm creative, as long as the glue sticks are not dried out and the finger paint isn't used up.

Right away, the people were warm and welcoming.
We had a lot of diversity in the room. 
Different shapes, sizes, and ages.
  Some people I knew really well, some people I knew about, and some people I had never met before.  

I felt we were all connected in that we didn't fit a specific mold.

Everyone had a journey, a story, a walk, and a philosophy of life.
I loved reconnecting with old friends and making new friends!

I want Professor B's sparkly blue skirt.
I really enjoyed our teachers.
Professor B. and Yogi Love

I think Connor would have loved Professor B.
She happens to be a gifted (published) author.
She has this calming, intelligent voice partnered with these colorful tattoos and a tiny, jeweled nose ring.  I could see him asking her a million questions about that nose ring (and trying to see if he could get one). 

Yogi Love knows her craft as well.  
I never thought she would get our group grounded enough to do the yoga moves effectively.
She was able to have us move from each sequence, and she created an atmosphere of relaxation and flow.  She taught us how attitude and movement impact how we feel and how we react.

They were beautiful teachers.

compliments to the cook:
snacks/ lunch with fresh fruits, vegetables, cheeses, and nuts

Like my nature, if I exercise, I prefer it to be quick to some rock and roll.  I feel like if I'm not breathing hard and sweating (and believe me it doesn't take much), I'm not doing work.

Yogi Love taught us that this is about being present while appreciating the fact that you can move, you can breath, you can show love to yourself!!  

You can also give yourself a workout in this mental process.

I tend to hold my breath a lot throughout the day, especially if I am upset.  I even hold my breath when I exercise. I don't even notice it until I let it out in a whoooossshhh.

Over the weekend, a was made to do a lot of deep breathing.    
I noticed the impact right away.  
Not only did I not need my inhaler, but I felt so much more relaxed.

the beautiful studio created a lovely element to the workshop

Professor B. lead us in some creative writing exercises.
I love my word processor, but I didn't think my MACbook would be welcome.

I brought a sketchpad.

The simple act of writing with a pen, and without auto spell check, copy/paste, and Google search, grounded me.

I was really shocked at how much I had to say and how much I was able to write creatively.  
I filled every minute of time with space in that sketchpad. 
It was a miracle.

Professor B. lead us in a series of touching poems during the yoga sequence.  We followed that with writing our own myths.

My unedited myths are here and here.  

Perhaps I can go back and give my stories more detail soon.

(I know there are incomplete sentences, I'm obsessed with the overuse of the comma, and one is not suppose to end a sentence in a preposition.  This is CREATIVE bad sentence structure.)

a dear 'tree' friend 

Through poetry, prose, breath, movement, motion, and friendship... 
I felt myself..well... connect to myself. 

a walk in the present

Normally, I am unable to focus to pray for longer than a few minutes.
I found myself developing more of a spiritual connection with God through the meditation. 

God showed me through the stretching of my fingers to the wiggling of my toes that I was loved and we should show self love.

Yogi Love made a great point during our restorative session:
If you look at the persecution of people going on in the world right now, whether it be for their gender or for their faith, we have a lot to be thankful for in America.  
We should appreciate what we have and who we are at all times. 
We should love our brother and sister, regardless of differences.

Be Present.
Have Faith.


5 AM this morning:
 movement partnered with writing out my prayers

My new philosophy:  Lotus Pray, Lotus all Pray

I think the older I get, 
the more I've come to the realization that this is truly the body that we have for life.
The more aware we are of our bodies, the more love we offer ourselves through healthy choices and limitation, the more love and service we will be able to offer others.

I hope to use these strategies to truly manage stress in my life without completely putting out my creative fire!

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
-Psalm 139:14

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