Top 15 Things God Taught Me As VBS Director

1.  Beg for Volunteers Early (use guilt tactics...like I have an ulcer and my Uncle Louey ran over my cat, please help me)

2.  Hoard hooks, double sided tape, and fake plants early on… (sneak double sided tape past the deacons)

3.  Recruit outside church for volunteers (Hold up a sign that says ‘Will Dance for VBS Workers’ on the side of the Highway).

4.  Don’t get too set about a vision, it isn’t going to look the way you want it… because God has a better plan and it will look better!

5.  Take the time and effort on decorations…it makes everyone more excited.

6.  Don’t stress…. Satan will tell you there isn’t enough money, people, and that you are doing a bad job.  The truth is there is enough and God takes care of all things.

7.  Pair yourself with someone to talk with when decorating and cleaning up (I made lots of NEW friends, I think. Hmmmm.  Maybe they were like ‘I don’t want to be rude, but shut the crap up’! but I'm SURE no one thought that of me :)).

8.  To (kind of) quote Blanche DuBois (street car named desire)...always depend on the kindness of strangers (at the Goodwill) …they might slip you some extra cloth.

9.  Kids LOVE live animals.

10.  Don’t leave REAL eggs lying around and grape juice can get tricky in the sanctuary.

11.  WATCH AND LEARN:  from the talents and skills of the people who volunteer their time, energy, and gifts for others.  It’s both awesome and amazing to watch people drive long distances, work long hours, and provide free items so that people can draw closer to Christ.

12.  When working with dye…makes sure the tin pan doesn’t have holes.

13.  Don’t serve flat bread until the END of a drama.

14.  Adults should worship like children…children don’t care who is beside them…they only care that God is listening.

15.  Take a picture of what the Sunday School Classrooms are like BEFORE you start moving and decorating, because I’m pretty sure Sunday morning people are going to think they are at the wrong church after our “cleanup”.
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We had a great Vacation Bible School week.  We will never know how many seeds we planted, but if feels good knowing we had a small role in teaching so many that ‘…nothing is impossible with God’.

ATTACK OF THE SMARTMOUTH

There is an evil lurking in my home.  It sneaks up when you least expect it.  It is quite surprising.  The evil is known as THE SMARTMOUTH.    While all is quiet and calm in the land, SMARTMOUTH arrives and attacks!  It takes over my sweet cherub, blue eyed, little boy.  He suddenly turns into a strong willed five year old.

Can I have a cookie, mom? No, you just had a…….SMARTMOUTH:  NO!!!  I WANT A COOKIE!

Connor clean up your toys.  SMARTMOUTH:  I’m BUSY!

Mom can I have a drink? After I fold the laundry.  SMARTMOUTH:  I’m thirsty NOW!

Connor sit down quietly.  SMARTMOUTH:  YOU sit quiet..it..ly!

Now my first instinct is to slap SMARTMOUTH silly, but I know that may not get us where I want to go.  I want SMARTMOUTH to understand how to take direction, be respectful, kind, considerate, and listen to his elders.  So begins the war with SMARTMOUTH…explaining right from wrong, taking away privileges, and using the good ole’ Evil Eye that warns I have power that can take on SMARTMOUTH (and I can inflict pain if needed)!

I sigh with relief when SMARTMOUTH is temporarily defeated and my child returns to normal:

I love you mom!

Thank you for reading the story.

Dad, I had a good day playing with you today.

I want to help animals that don’t have homes.

I love God!  He gives me a home, pets, and a family!

I can't wait to start kindergarten and make friends.

But every mom knows not to get too comfortable because.... ATTACK OF THE KNOW IT ALL…is lurking right behind SMARTMOUTH! 

Why I LOVE Days of Our Lives

I don’t always get to blog my daily thoughts, so I have to jot everything down and wait until I have a chance and do them all at once.  I know everyone has been dying to know what I’ve been up to so far this summer (and by everyone I mean my two followers), but I’m certain there are people from all over the USA reading my blog w/out hitting follow.  J  Anyway, as director of VBS I have been preparing for events that start next week, and trying to learn the parts for Mary’s Drama.  My brain doesn’t work like it use to…so I can’t remember anything.  Which brings me to my next point…a girl needs a break, right?  My “breaks” have consisted of catching up on Days of Our Lives.  Now, I haven’t watched this show in years, but the pure Cheese*tasticness* of the show has pulled me into watching.  No one (and I mean NOOOO one) has better cheesy scenes than Days of our Lives…which is why I will never stop loving it.

Four Reasons I LOVE Days or Our Lives:

1. The Classics Never Get Old.  This clip is when Marleena is possessed by a Demon, and I guess John turns into a priest to save her.  First, thank you so much to the make up people on Days…you managed to make Marleena look just like Satan or AKA. Me before makeup and coffee.  Second, I love John’s DRAMATIC stare at Marleena/Satan when she gasps! No! she…shee…sits up and SHOWS HER BODY!  YES!  She shows her naked body people!?!?!  Check out John’s face as he turns in fear of giving into his lust.  I miss John and Marleena.

2. Product Placement.  Just when you thought they couldn’t get any cornier they go for Product Placement.  ‘Hey hot guy, I’m so glad you came to visit me in my cute hot girl outfit (my standard outfit I study in)…so I can show you what I LOVE to eat.  Cheerios is nutrition, and delicious, and a good snack, and healthy for me, and helps me stay lean, and doctor recommended, and makes these cute o’s, and lowers my blood pressure, and is easy to carry around, and I just love, love, love Cheerios!”

3.  Great Stunt Scenes.  In this scene the dude in the black (I don’t know his name) has been given truth serum that makes him hallucinate that Sammi is the old woman he killed.   Watch as he pushes Sammi down the steps.  Now I watch her tumbling down a few steps while holding on to the rail...but the viewer must believe it is enough to kill a woman or at least knock her out cold.  Watch Sammi fall (so dramatically) it knocks her out.

4.  The Love Scenes.  How do you know if it’s a great soap love scene?  1.  Does the guy have a shirt on unbuttoned to see his chest?? Check.  2.  Does the girl look torn and love stricken….her mind is saying 'no' but her eyes are saying 'yes, yes'!  check.  3. Cue the love/elevator/cheap hotel music.  Check.  4.  Is there heavy breathing? Yes. Then double check. (ex.  You (heavy breathing) are (heavy breathing) here (heavy breathing) to (heavy breathing) see (heavy breathing) me (heavy breathing).  5.  Is there a passionate kiss that could be cut down a bit. Check.  If you have all these then you apparently have a great love scene.

Well I guess you know why I haven’t gotten much done, but I consider it research for the people.  Happy TV watching!

Happy Father's Day

Quotes by Darren:

-(Fixing your VBS costume)…’I guess I’ll do like Rambo and cut it, but Rambo didn’t have a measuring tool, he had to work under primitive conditions.’

-‘This dinner taste like it’s wrapped in blue ribbon.’

-'Connor is so slow in the morning; it would take him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.'

-(in the middle of arguing with Connor) ‘you gotta beat the man to be the man, whoooo!!’

-‘I don’t like Burgundy, it makes me look thin.’

-‘Dancing is always optional, and I opt to not do it.’

-‘My hair isn’t coming out; it’s just really, really light.’

-‘It’s not fair people have to go to the moon to have a smoke’ (from a nonsmoker)

-Teaching Connor- full nelson, iron claw, sleeper, figure four, moonsalt (jumping off the top rope backwards)

-‘I wish we lived in the Andy Griffith Show.’

-‘How do you clean the house so fast?’

-‘The dishwasher works best if you let the dishes air dry for a couple of days.’

-(Connor lost a shoe at the mall)  ‘Whoa!  He’s got a flat tire, hold everything.’

-‘Honey would it be Okay if I got a Turbo Buick today?’

-‘The North is really different…instead of doing a doughnut in a car...they call it cookies.  Hey man that’s a nice Mustang, how many cookies will it do?!?’

-‘I’m tired of riding in this pace car.’ (in reference to his new gas efficient car)

‘NASCAR is so lame.  They almost have to hit their turn signal to pass these days.’

-‘Connor was worried the play at church would be loud.  Like Mary, Jesus’ Mother, would come out spinning fire to drums.’

Thanks to one cool, funny, and loving dad and husband who keeps us laughing every single day!  We love you.  Happy Father’s Day.

Rose Colored Glasses Are Off

I’ll never forget in Dr.B’s class when he asked me in college education 101 in front of everyone…”how are you going to stay a positive teacher in a public school setting?”  I thought to myself….for one I will be getting a steady paycheck with a steady schedule which is more than I am getting at Food Lion.  But I answered out loud “I plan to stay positive through my student’s learning experiences and I plan to keep a journal of reflection that will help me power through my problems” (all that was missing from that speech was a cheerleading skirt, a high kick, and a ‘GOOOOO Teachers!).  Dr. B’s response right away was to laugh hysterically at me and I felt so embarrassed.  I should have guessed there was something they were not telling me then.  How the heck was I suppose to answer that question?  I was 21, I had no children, husband, mortgage, or teaching job….I only thought I knew about challenges.

So here I am going into my tenth year teaching.  My challenges are reaching a variety of abilities, with or without the support of parents, coworkers who may or may not be supportive, and a society that doesn’t really care about it either way.  I keep getting this crazy message:  ‘teaching is a thankless job’…wow I’m really deep now.  But seriously, I had visions of all of my students so involved in their excellent learning experiences that I wouldn’t need books or materials or a behavior plan, visions of the world thanking me for my excellent work, visions of greedy learners all begging for more as I orchestrate a totally awesome school day, and visions of sugar plums dancing in my head. 

I’ve learned those visions are a touch unrealistic, and with the legislation voting on the biggest educational cut in history my rose colored glasses are really off.   I am starting my year with the following supplies paid for by the state:  3 ink cartridges (and that’s if someone doesn’t catch the 2.00 I went over).   Teaching is exactly like parenting….there is no thank you in parenting, but you just know you have to find the energy, resources, and Faith to do the best you can.  There is no immediate payoff, but there is a huge investment, and that investment is the life of a child.  I just hang on to the things that are awesome in my room that no one can really understand….

-the child who struggles and fights for every word that looks like Latin, but who grew five levels in reading anyway

-the nonverbal students that communicate with a movement, look, feel for the first time

- the desperate and appreciative parents who sincerely thank you for giving some hope for believing in growth

-the shy student that stands up to make a speech about how much they love school

-the little dancer that leads us all into the perfect Tooty Ta

- the celebration of each milestone with cheers and laughter

-the student graduations into more challenging classrooms with better dreams and a new mentality

My game plan:  give all things to God and know that it will continue to work.  I’ve always heard ‘those who can’t teach’…my new slogan is ‘Those who are Brave teach, and those who don’t care get out of my way'.

What's Great About Summer?

No more pencils, no more books, no more teacher's dirty looks!  Ha. ha. don't worry I don't give dirty looks, but packing away the classroom has come with happy and sad feelings.  I  am losing some precious students to the intermediate school, they have aged out, but they will always be my little guys and girls.

The Banana Splits

Splashing in Puddles

End of Year Parties

New Boots

Baseball Games- Go DASH!

Face Paint

Fighting Crime in Face Paint and New Boots

No Scrunchies!

Ladies I know its summer..but there is no excuse for bad hair.  So I am giving you some summer hair help secrets with some assistance from the little ladies at my school.  So remember, no matter how HOT you are..put the scrunchies down and try this instead.


I didn't wash my hair, so I put a big bun on my head w/ a huge flower...both pretty and hides bad hair.



velcro curlers, girl's best friend if you have flat hair like me

after velcro curlers- I call this the Kate Middleton




when all else fails, add pigtails!

 Other INSPIRED hair dos came from these cute primary ladies at my school, they were very excited to model off their hair!  Since I have a little boy, this was fun, these girls are so cute!

this little flower lights up in the middle, i thought it was so cute, and she felt so pretty

who doesn't love a pink sparkled jewel?



what a beautiful head of hair!?  She knows how to wear a ponytail!



I thought this was a pretty, cool do, I love the little braids.  Just as cute as she can be!

Pull your bangs back with a pretty bow!

I wish my hair would do this..I love all those pretty bows and braids.



This braid keeps her cool on field day and is beautiful!



Hope we gave you some hair ideas, and I HOPE I don't see you with a scrunchie this summer!