40 weeks and an A+ Farewell

Today I worked my final day at school (until May).  40 weeks pregnant and I made it, Praise God and people who are so helpful!!!

Now the Time is Up.  I shouldn’t word it like that.   Time is here?  (does that sound better)

Carlee will be here tomorrow! 

Connor is very excited that he is going to be a big brother…so much that when I asked him this morning “are you excited about your sister coming?”  he said “I’m more excited about no homework tonight.”  When I picked him up today, I said “are you excited about tomorrow?”  His response, “I’m excited I get to wake up and play with my toys.”  (Not really the direction I was trying to take him, but he is probably very sick of hearing 'are you excited to be a big brother?'  Besides he will find out very soon….we are getting company and she ain’t leavin’.)

Today my class threw me a little baby shower.

Oh Boy were they excited!  They all made me cards with a pink cake and pink frosting and Mrs. E. made them a little basket to give me with baby items.  They all wished me a sweet good bye.

Surprise!

There was lots of discussion today, my input was not needed of course.  These are the quotes I wrote down from my K-2ers….

-Where do babies come from?

-From the stork, DUH.

-your not suppose to say DUH.

-Nuuhhh, uhhhh…they come from Heaven.

-They are going to cut that baby out of Mrs. S. with a knife.

-Are you going to die Mrs. S.??  I hope you don’t DIE!

-she isn't going to Die.

-Where is the baby now?

-IN her tummy, that is why she is fat.

-Yeah she is BIG, BIG, BIG.

-Mrs. S.’s feet are puffy, I’ll get a chair.

-I’ll get another chair.
-How is that baby coming out?

-at the hospital, DUH.

The kids all created a card that showed ‘Things the kids said they would miss about Mrs. S.’…

-“giving us stickers”

-“because we just will”

-“because she is the best”

-“her son Connor”

-“her baby”

-“helping us count money”

-“helping us learn”

-“J” (no comment)

-“doing math with her”

I love the picture that shows I AM THE ONE crying because everyone misses me.

At the back table with my maternity substitute:

Student:  “Are you going to be Mrs. S.?”

Mrs. M: “I guess so, when she has her baby.”

Student:  “Well, now you need to take your shoes and socks off because that is what she does.”

(busted)

Whoever said students with special needs aren’t both observant and astute have obviously never spent any amount of time with children.  

I would be lying if I didn’t say Mr. Anxiety began to visit me again…about two days ago and hasn’t left. 

feeling my head with the worst case scenarios and the what ifs…..

I've been asked how excited I am many times this week, and I am excited, but also a little..how do I word this... SCARED OUT OF MY MIND.  I AM about to have MAJOR surgery and a human life is being removed (WOWZA).

But I’m trying to boot Mr. Anxiety out of my head and not let it rob my joy, and it has been a wonderful pregnancy.

As my students would say, 'don't worry, more cake please, DUH!"

Sometimes the teacher is the best learner!

Main Staples for the Pregnant Woman (with stinky feet)

I’m going to the doctor weekly now.  Basically, I go in…they check my blood pressure, weight, urine sample, measure my belly, I hold my breath hoping they say I have to put my feet up for 48 hours so I will have an excuse to be lazy, but they just say ‘your healthy as a horse, see you next week’ and I’m on my merry way.  (I really AM happy I'm as healthy as a horse.)

However, this past doctor visit was a little different.  I unexpectedly had to have a more intrusive exam, one where you have to remove everything from the waist down…etc.   This may not seem so bad, except for a few issues.

1.     My feet are RANK.  My favorite shoe wear is the generic Ugg type boots that don’t require socks, and my swollen feet kind of get stuck in there and sweat and the black fuzz sticks to my feet and ….OK YOU GET THE PICTURE.  Let’s just say I took them off once in class and my students begged me to get rid of the funky smell.

2.    DANG JUDY….has it been that long since I shaved my legs? 

3.    I was really planning to cut my toe nails this weekend…it’s something that resembles exercise at this stage and I kind of avoid it.

I carefully remove my shoes in the tiny bathroom….and YOWZA it was worse than I thought.  The smell combined with my black fuzz toes and hairy legs…it was just embarrassing people.  Oh man, I can’t go out there.  I tried to wash my feet in the sink.  Did you know a pregnant woman can’t put her feet in the sink?  It’s impossible (and I had the red face to prove it).  I pulled MORE paper towels down and tried to scrub my feet.  At this point, the trashcan is filling up with all the paper towels.  What now?  Think.  What would Angus MacGyver do??  I got my pocket book.  I searched through it.  The only thing I could find was my pint size Vampire Blood Germ X.   

It smells good.  My plan:  Drown my feet in the smell of Germ X. (is the nurse thinking I’m an alcoholic worse than having stinky feet?)   I drenched my feet in Germ X anyway.  Then I hear the nurse call ‘everything all right in there?’  I have no choice; I have to go out there.  I cut the water off, and clean the bathroom.  At this point, I’m pretty tired.  When I exit the bathroom, I explain that I truly am sorry for the smell of my feet, hairy legs, and long toe nails.  The nurse looks at me as if I’m #1 NUTS, and tells me to get up on the table NOW (but I don’t think it was my imagination that she wrinkled her nose).

The moral of the story is there are certain staples a pregnant woman needs in the last trimester. Starting with toenail clippers, lotion, and possibly a razor.

When I was pregnant with Connor, dressing for the last term was a little easier because it was summer and I was out for summer vacation.  Flip-flops, summer dresses, Capri pants, and a long shirt worked pretty good.  Dressing for work in the winter when you are this size….

can be pretty tricky.  Allow me to share a few more staples of the extra largey, large woman who wants to look as professional as a woman can who swallowed a watermelon.  Ladies some must haves on a BUDGET....

1.    Black Pants that GROW with you (not the trendy kind)

2.    One NICE Black Maternity Dress that you can wear to the end

3.    Navy Pants that Grow with you

4.    Slip on SHOES (1/2 size larger)

5.    A Few Flowy Tops with COLOR

6.    Accessorize, Accessorize, Accessorize

So take my advice and you will be as GOOD AS GOLD!

(and for the Love of Pete, don't forget the Germ X!!!)

You May be a Pregnant Person If...

You May be a Pregnant Person If…..

·         -You tried using your cell phone three times only to realize it isn’t turned on.

·         -Your 12 hour bra gives out 4 hours early (and forget about the ‘support’ hose).

·         -You are ‘barefoot and pregnant’ because they don’t make shoes in extra short and triple wide.

·         -During prayer and praise request in church, your response is, “Tyler that is so wonderful, Praise the Lord!” and Tyler’s response is, “I just requested prayer because I was stung by a bee!?!  And I’m allergic to bees!?  SO why are you praising the Lord??”  My response, ‘ummmm, because your alive! Praise the Lord! You’re alive!” [quick save, right?]

·         -You write a Facebook message that reads like this ….i will found that righting i here about… (Interpretation-I will find that writing I heard about…).  Don’t worry I deleted it as soon as I read it….. three days later.

·         -Gas pains are enough to leave you knelling on the floor.

·         -You have to add things like ‘shower’ and ‘brush teeth’ to your list of things to do.

·         -Dinner may be a creative mix of white bread, potato chips, and Lucky Charms.

·         -You actually have to weigh the pros and cons of dragging yourself off the couch to take the Lysol and matches out of your other child’s hands.

·        -Long John Silver fried crunchies taste like Fillet Mignon.

·         -You secretly want to wear a shirt that says ‘THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I PARTY NAKED!’  (For shock value of course.)

·                                           -You would like to globally request that people please 1. Spare you the worst birth stories they have ever heard, such as, I labored for 20 hours and the docs could not give me meds so I passed out and was cut open while I still felt it!  2. Quit telling me what to eat.  3.  Don't guess the sex of the baby based on the way that I ‘carry your weight’. FYI- I have carried my weight in the same places since I was six..ALL over.

-               -Doctor’s appointments become the NEW anticipation, though worrisome, growing a human is exciting stuff!

*special blogger note:  Comments such as 'wait until the baby gets here, then life really will be hell on earth' DOES not help the one who is pregnant.  These comments are not useful, smart, or nice. thank you very much.

A Visit from the Stork

1.1.05

"I can’t believe it’s year 2005!  I just got use to 2004.  This year will be the most special of all because I learned 4 days ago I’m pregnant! (Talk about a life changing moment).  I am very excited.  Today I have been cleaning closets to get ready for you and I’m only four weeks.  I’ve already called four daycares about openings.  I’m very worried that something might happen but I am going to push that to the side.  Meanwhile, your father is worrying about money (don’t worry you’ll get use to it!)  The rest of the family is very excited about your arrival.  I am both nervous and excited about this unexpected journey.”

The above was my first journal entry when I found out I was pregnant with Connor, and boy was I CLUELESS about the challenges ahead…I was clueless about how hard it would be and about how wonderful it would be. 

Here I am again!  I found out I am about 5 weeks pregnant with child #2!!! Oh My Gosh…that sounds strange.  Everyone knows I can barely remember where I put my keys.  But I know that God would not give me this gift if He didn’t believe I could do it.  

Currently, the whole family is excited like in my first journal entry. I can tell you I’m not cleaning out any closets or calling daycares.  I’ve been through this song and dance before and I know that stressing out and trying to plan every single detail is like a cat chasing its tail.  Of course not much has changed with Darren; I think I heard him having an intimate talk with the checkbook last night.  He is certain we are now doomed to live in a paper box.   

Anytime I feel myself getting afraid or nervous I pray about it…..it’s a tried and true technique people!!  It comforts me, because this is probably the last time I will be pregnant and I want to enjoy it.

Philippians 4:6-7
don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. (NLT)

No one is more excited than Connor!  He talks about it often, asking me lots of questions.  (Can I tell you a secret- it’s a great discipline technique.  'If your going to be a big brother you have to set an example, you have to brush your teeth, you have to open the car door for mom', etc. etc.)  Of course this is Connor, so he thinks the baby will be here next week. 

One thing is certain, gone are the days when I had the house to myself as a pregnant women.  Good bye nap times, good bye to quiet book reading, and good bye to long bubble baths.  Now I have a little boy watching everything.  This morning I started watching Baby Story on TLC and it didn’t take long for me to decide I better turn it before C. got more educated than needed….his journal entries are already going to be colorful enough at school.  After lunch I let him look through a Pregnancy Week by Week book.  I swear  I previewed the whole thing…there are apparently pictures on the flip side I forgot about.  I didn’t think much of it until I heard him laughing hysterically at a picture of a buck naked pregnant woman (don’t worry that book is now on the top shelf).   Who poses naked at 9 months pregnant??   Really I know what my parts look like, I don’t need a diagram.  Geez Wheez.

Meanwhile, I hope that you all will think of me in your own prayers because between this and kindergarten I’ll need lot's of Divine Intervention!:) 

Connor's First Pictures